Whatever will be, will be - or will it?

The Quotes

"Grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference." 

Attributed to Reinhold Niebuhr. 

"Que será, será - whatever will be, will be." 

Jay Livingston and Ray Evans, notably sang by Doris Day. 

The Facts

We are wired to be vigilant, to scan for potential threats and recognise negative possibilities to keep us safe. These days, this might include your job, relationships, health and the future. 

But research shows that a large percentage of what we worry about never actually happens, and if it does occur, people say that they handled it better than expected.

A lot of worry comes from trying to control outcomes that are completely out of your hands.

The distinction between what you can and can't control is often blurrier than it seems. You can't control other people's reactions, but you can control your words. You may not be able to control whether you get the job, but you can probably control how well you prepare for the interview. Learning this difference is the key to peace of mind.

So, being able to recognise where we can create positive changes in our lives - and for the things we have no control over, Que será, será.

Thoughts

• What are you losing sleep over that you can't actually influence? 

  Other people's opinions or things that already happened? The weather, your boss's mood or global news events?

• What small action could you take today on something you can control? 

  Your health, skills or relationships?

• Who in your life models this balance well? What do they do differently when faced with uncertainty?

Ok that’s all, for now!